Emotional Overload Is Rooted in Fear Last week I said goodbye to the phone I’d had for more than 3 years, a phone I was attached to more than I’d like to admit. I entered a state of complete overwhelm, spiraling between questions and frustrations, between crying and raging: How could I possibly learn a new phone? Why aren’t there any small phones? How will one of the new—BIG—phones fit in my pocket? It’s not fair that all the phones are large, while women’s pants ... Read more ...
love
Turning 40 with the Gift of 40 Miles: Why I’m Taking Myself on Walks This Month
May is both my birth month and a time of transition (when the school year ends and summer begins). For as long as I can remember, I’ve looked forward to May and its potential for renewal. This year I’m celebrating my 40th birthday and wanting to mark the occasion with extended time on trails. Specifically, I’m setting a goal to hike 40 miles on my own this month: miles that I’ll walk toward understanding how to be independent within interdependence. Why This ... Read more ...
My New Year’s Resolution = Self-Love for Countering White Fragility
The days leading up to this new year have been bumpy for me, pushing me to recommit to radical self-love. I’ve had some really tough conversations with family around everyday injustice, and these conversations have reminded me why we need a deep well of emotional literacies for confronting complicity. In the midst of one of these tough conversations—in which I was speaking aloud my embodied responses to white supremacy—I shared that my heart was throbbing, and I ... Read more ...
Parenting Myself 101
Over the past few months, I’ve been learning more about how to care for myself—a sort of self-care that I’m calling “parenting myself 101.” After a career change, cross-county move, and intense internal work “inside the chrysalis,” I’ve recognized the need to put good self-parenting into place. The language of “parenting” has been helpful for me to break from “self-care” focused on relaxation as an escape from everyday life. Rather than experiencing self-care as ... Read more ...
Inside the Chrysalis, or Experiencing Mess, Mess, and More Mess
It’s not uncommon for me to ride emotional roller-coasters with swings from sweet to sour as I go about my days. More and more, I’ve noticed these swings as I’ve tuned in with my emotions and embodied self through Reiki, yoga, and other contemplative practices. The more I do inner work and the more I embrace mess, the more the messiness of being an always-incomplete, imperfect human inevitability shows up. Still, if I’m being honest with myself, the past few weeks have ... Read more ...
A Love Letter to Students Surviving Sexual Violence
As we near the end of spring semester, students in both my “Contemplative Writing” and “Writing for Social Justice” courses are pulling together projects to make interventions in some way. Several students are addressing rape culture, and one student is compiling a book of letters by and for survivors of sexual violence. She hopes that others at our university will read the letters, write additional ones, and add threaded response—facilitating healing through ... Read more ...
Snapshots of Support
This week I’ve felt stretched thin—waking up earlier and heading to bed later than I’d like. One moment, I’m reviewing students’ midterm portfolios. The next, I’m scripting a hard conversation. While attending to microaggressions and facilitating tricky online and in-person conversations, I’m also sharing hopeful-yet-emotional announcements with family, friends, colleagues, and students. In the midst of such frenzied and frenetic activity, I’ve been finding support ... Read more ...
Writing with Heartache
In this week of Valentine’s Day—a week when I’ve been teaching bell hooks’s Feminism Is for Everybody; sharing love notes that amplify hooks's words; and meditating with students about love as action, commitment, and a call to authenticity—I’m sitting with heartache. Heartache that gun violence continues unchecked and that proclamations of love are flooded by the pain and fear of regular, normalized, and numbing violence. Heartache that a series of online and phone ... Read more ...
Spell-Casting and Other Contemplative Practices for Reflection and Recovery
In the past two weeks, I’ve been listening to a LOT of guided meditations, as a concussion has me grounded. I’m grounded in the sense of a child who’s misbehaved: sent to my room, with limited activities, and in reflection on what’s gotten me here. And I’m grounded in the sense of rooting down and deep, strengthening the base/foundation from which I can grow. Truly, I’m grateful for “the grounding,” and I’m grateful for the contemplative practices that are helping me ... Read more ...
Holding Space and Being Present: Two Resolutions Following the Las Vegas Shooting
I woke yesterday morning to news of the Las Vegas shooting, continued calls for aid needed in Puerto Rico, and boos for kneeling NFL players at Sunday’s games. Though seemingly unrelated, these news stories relayed a larger message about the presence of everyday violence in our lives. My social media feeds were naming and critiquing this violence. People were already calling for action, for donations, and for prayers—for linking individual narratives with larger social ... Read more ...
![My emotions are all over the place and surprising me these days—a sure sign that I’m grieving. One minute I’m crying, and the next I’m laughing. Then I’m irritable, exhausted, and falling asleep or fighting sleep. I’m hopeful and despondent and desiring and imagining and so, so much more.
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This photo represents one of the upbeat moments of the past week: feeling supported by the natural world, connected with my partner, and interested in the eagle perched nearby.
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I want to hold onto this sense of what’s possible, asking myself regularly: What/who am I connected with? Curious about? Inspired by? Committed to? Longing for? Bringing into being?
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Truly in a state of both/and, may I feel the pain and possibilities of this time—not denying what’s happening or taking it all on myself, but being in/with what’s required of us (individually and collectively) at this time.
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My counselor tells me that we’re experiencing vicarious trauma in addition to individual and collective grief. We’re each having our own histories of trauma, loss, injustice, and wrongdoing activated. And we’re attempting to hold space for each other, while needing others to hold space for us. Our capacities to show up will ebb and flow (will be all over the place, much like our emotions), but staying with the question of what am I able to hold is what’s required now. So, I stay with these questions, these emotions, these awarenesses. I stay in the mess of it all.
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Thoughts on this Friday, as I try to settle my body through writing. With love. <3 Beth
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[This image shows a selfie of me and my partner, both wearing jackets and black hats, surrounded by marshlands: water and mud and a cloudy sky.]
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#reflections #reflection #emotions #emotional #emotionalliteracy #outdoors #outdoorphotography](http://scontent-lga3-1.cdninstagram.com/v/t51.2885-15/sh0.08/e35/c2.0.1435.1435a/s640x640/90827178_143254807199654_4490575750736160124_n.jpg?_nc_ht=scontent-lga3-1.cdninstagram.com&_nc_cat=102&_nc_ohc=-knC9GpgshEAX8gwT0W&oh=76bd6a4daaa6c266b1c69c1d57546628&oe=5EA9C71D "My emotions are all over the place and surprising me these days—a sure sign that I’m grieving. One minute I’m crying, and the next I’m laughing. Then I’m irritable, exhausted, and falling asleep or fighting sleep. I’m hopeful and despondent and desiring and imagining and so, so much more.
.
This photo represents one of the upbeat moments of the past week: feeling supported by the natural world, connected with my partner, and interested in the eagle perched nearby.
.
I want to hold onto this sense of what’s possible, asking myself regularly: What/who am I connected with? Curious about? Inspired by? Committed to? Longing for? Bringing into being?
.
Truly in a state of both/and, may I feel the pain and possibilities of this time—not denying what’s happening or taking it all on myself, but being in/with what’s required of us (individually and collectively) at this time.
.
My counselor tells me that we’re experiencing vicarious trauma in addition to individual and collective grief. We’re each having our own histories of trauma, loss, injustice, and wrongdoing activated. And we’re attempting to hold space for each other, while needing others to hold space for us. Our capacities to show up will ebb and flow (will be all over the place, much like our emotions), but staying with the question of what am I able to hold is what’s required now. So, I stay with these questions, these emotions, these awarenesses. I stay in the mess of it all.
.
Thoughts on this Friday, as I try to settle my body through writing. With love. <3 Beth
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[This image shows a selfie of me and my partner, both wearing jackets and black hats, surrounded by marshlands: water and mud and a cloudy sky.]
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#reflections #reflection #emotions #emotional #emotionalliteracy #outdoors #outdoorphotography")
![Individually and collectively, we’re sitting with a LOT in this moment, including a lot of uncertainty, change, and crisis. If you’d like to connect and process with others, consider joining an upcoming lunchtime webinar: “Processing the Pandemic with Heart-Head-Hands.”
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You could drop in tomorrow, or make it a habit (joining weekly on Wednesdays).
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Learn more and register: link in bio.
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[This image shows colorful paintbrush strokes shaping a heart and has the words "online processing space" on top of the heart.]
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#processing #holdingspace #communitycare #pandemic #meetingonline #connection #heartheadhands #feeling #thinking #doing #together #gathering #gatheringonline](http://scontent-lga3-1.cdninstagram.com/v/t51.2885-15/sh0.08/e35/s640x640/90861773_663154867774183_7278386536859769139_n.jpg?_nc_ht=scontent-lga3-1.cdninstagram.com&_nc_cat=107&_nc_ohc=4Yn9uQtGwsUAX_fyUVu&oh=4d658e49c16051f1b8eae9d0159744b2&oe=5EA8F4CA "Individually and collectively, we’re sitting with a LOT in this moment, including a lot of uncertainty, change, and crisis. If you’d like to connect and process with others, consider joining an upcoming lunchtime webinar: “Processing the Pandemic with Heart-Head-Hands.”
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You could drop in tomorrow, or make it a habit (joining weekly on Wednesdays).
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Learn more and register: link in bio.
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[This image shows colorful paintbrush strokes shaping a heart and has the words \"online processing space\" on top of the heart.]
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#processing #holdingspace #communitycare #pandemic #meetingonline #connection #heartheadhands #feeling #thinking #doing #together #gathering #gatheringonline")
![So much is changing day-to-day, but one thing that consistently grounds and guides me is writing. So, connecting in online writing community feels especially important at this time.
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If you’d also like support through an online group, consider joining this next group, starting Tuesday.
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Register and learn more via link in bio.
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And if you know others who might be interested, please share with them. I find that folks find my offerings through personal connections and word-of-mouth recommendations. BIG THANKS!
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[This image shows a pink journal with “dots” written on the cover, alongside pink gemstones and gold sparkly hearts, bracelet, and ink pen: all against a white background.]
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#WritingCommunity #WritingGroup #OnlineWritingGroup #writers #writersofinstagram #writerslife #writerscommunity #writersblock #instawritersgroup #academiclife #academicwriting #blogging #grantwriting #dissertation #writingsupport #journaling #drafting #revising #recommitting #publishing #techwriting #supportforwriters #writingsupport #writerssupportingwriters #write #writing](http://scontent-lga3-1.cdninstagram.com/v/t51.2885-15/sh0.08/e35/s640x640/90318620_493368561539197_3086907694045978767_n.jpg?_nc_ht=scontent-lga3-1.cdninstagram.com&_nc_cat=101&_nc_ohc=GjGP0ReEaH8AX-Ssgee&oh=535514e9c844b2e4341c418d53df23f3&oe=5EA73C5B "So much is changing day-to-day, but one thing that consistently grounds and guides me is writing. So, connecting in online writing community feels especially important at this time.
.
If you’d also like support through an online group, consider joining this next group, starting Tuesday.
.
Register and learn more via link in bio.
.
And if you know others who might be interested, please share with them. I find that folks find my offerings through personal connections and word-of-mouth recommendations. BIG THANKS!
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[This image shows a pink journal with “dots” written on the cover, alongside pink gemstones and gold sparkly hearts, bracelet, and ink pen: all against a white background.]
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#WritingCommunity #WritingGroup #OnlineWritingGroup #writers #writersofinstagram #writerslife #writerscommunity #writersblock #instawritersgroup #academiclife #academicwriting #blogging #grantwriting #dissertation #writingsupport #journaling #drafting #revising #recommitting #publishing #techwriting #supportforwriters #writingsupport #writerssupportingwriters #write #writing")
![What a week and whirlwind it’s been!
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I woke this morning thinking about how I was scheduled to give a keynote and workshop with Jasmine Kar Tang at the Minnesota Writing and English (MnWE) conference today. Throughout the day, I’ve been feeling grateful for how the MnWE organizers communicated event changes, and I’m missing Minnesota friends (I hope to see you in-person in the future).
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Also this week, I shifted what would have been an in-person workshop to a Zoom meeting. There were downsides to moving online, but one upside is that the workshop, “What Matters to You Most? Career Discernment for YOUR Career Pathway,” is now online, thanks to the University of Minnesota’s Graduate School for sponsoring the workshop (and for keeping it scheduled). I share in the link in my bio, in case you might be interested in questions of commitment-driven career discernment (in the midst of #covid_19 and all the uncertainties of this time).
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There have been a LOT of uncertainties and changes day-to-day, and I’m grateful for conversations and community lifting me up this week. This includes friends and family; neighbors and mutual aid groups forming online; today’s online writing group (and a new group starting Tuesday); and folks showing up for “Processing the Pandemic with Heart-Head-Hands” (w/ gratitude for folks giving language to shared experiences).
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There’s been a lot to process each day, a lot of pivots to make, a lot of possibilities within each lesson (so many emotional and learning-full moments throughout the days). I’m not sure what’s ahead, and my heart is getting a real workout (from aching and grieving to feeling so loved) … but I sure am grateful for feeling closely connected (with myself and with others) in this moment of staying physically distant.
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Some thoughts on Friday~ with love, commitment, and willingness to face what’s ahead. ~ Beth <3
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[This image (taken from the Eventbrite page) shows a colorfully tiled V (like an arrow pointing down).]
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#Reflections #FridayFeeling #Workshops #WritingGroups #CommuinityCare #Gratitude #Support #GraduateEducation #HigherEducation #HigherEd #Academia #Careers #CareerDiscernment #CareerAdvice #reflection](http://scontent-lga3-1.cdninstagram.com/v/t51.2885-15/e35/c138.0.399.399a/90089552_587936011803957_6938475479033474092_n.jpg?_nc_ht=scontent-lga3-1.cdninstagram.com&_nc_cat=109&_nc_ohc=KoPRsQurh8MAX8QjTvd&oh=e8c3dc4ece996a93333571044759aedb&oe=5EA94D29 "What a week and whirlwind it’s been!
.
I woke this morning thinking about how I was scheduled to give a keynote and workshop with Jasmine Kar Tang at the Minnesota Writing and English (MnWE) conference today. Throughout the day, I’ve been feeling grateful for how the MnWE organizers communicated event changes, and I’m missing Minnesota friends (I hope to see you in-person in the future).
.
Also this week, I shifted what would have been an in-person workshop to a Zoom meeting. There were downsides to moving online, but one upside is that the workshop, “What Matters to You Most? Career Discernment for YOUR Career Pathway,” is now online, thanks to the University of Minnesota’s Graduate School for sponsoring the workshop (and for keeping it scheduled). I share in the link in my bio, in case you might be interested in questions of commitment-driven career discernment (in the midst of #covid_19 and all the uncertainties of this time).
.
There have been a LOT of uncertainties and changes day-to-day, and I’m grateful for conversations and community lifting me up this week. This includes friends and family; neighbors and mutual aid groups forming online; today’s online writing group (and a new group starting Tuesday); and folks showing up for “Processing the Pandemic with Heart-Head-Hands” (w/ gratitude for folks giving language to shared experiences).
.
There’s been a lot to process each day, a lot of pivots to make, a lot of possibilities within each lesson (so many emotional and learning-full moments throughout the days). I’m not sure what’s ahead, and my heart is getting a real workout (from aching and grieving to feeling so loved) … but I sure am grateful for feeling closely connected (with myself and with others) in this moment of staying physically distant.
.
Some thoughts on Friday~ with love, commitment, and willingness to face what’s ahead. ~ Beth <3
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.
[This image (taken from the Eventbrite page) shows a colorfully tiled V (like an arrow pointing down).]
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#Reflections #FridayFeeling #Workshops #WritingGroups #CommuinityCare #Gratitude #Support #GraduateEducation #HigherEducation #HigherEd #Academia #Careers #CareerDiscernment #CareerAdvice #reflection")
