I woke up today (the day after MLK Day in the U.S.) to a Facebook friend who presents as a white woman asking if I’d seen the #CovingtonCatholic student’s statement because she’s not sure what to believe. Later in the day, a white family member also sent me the statement, presumably to vindicate the white students. These messages come in response to me speaking out over the past few days about the incident, asking for white folks to break patterns of niceness and to ... Read more ...
white fragility
My New Year’s Resolution = Self-Love for Countering White Fragility
The days leading up to this new year have been bumpy for me, pushing me to recommit to radical self-love. I’ve had some really tough conversations with family around everyday injustice, and these conversations have reminded me why we need a deep well of emotional literacies for confronting complicity. In the midst of one of these tough conversations—in which I was speaking aloud my embodied responses to white supremacy—I shared that my heart was throbbing, and I ... Read more ...
Hurting and Hollering in the Wake of This Week’s Violence
Bombs sent, guns shot. And I cry. Histories hidden, truths buried. And I ache. Hateful laws, escalating harms. And I mourn. White terrorism, everyday violence. And I rage. Black folks targeted. Jewish folks targeted. Native folks targeted. Latinx folks targeted. Migrant folks targeted. Trans folks targeted. Femme folks targeted. Marginalized folks targeted. Targeted, passive voice. Failing to name the assailants. Failing to name white supremacist, ... Read more ...
Crocheting Granny Squares, Connecting to Grandmothers, and Crafting a More Just Future
Recently, I felt inspired to pick up crocheting again, after many seasons without touching a needle, hook, or yarn. Feeling the call for creative self-care, I ordered vegan yarn in the colors of the 7 chakras and laid them out, planning a small afghan of granny squares. Thread yarn onto hook. Chain five, and connect stitches, making a circle. Days after purchasing the yarn and only a few stitches into my first granny square, my mom shared some news. Betty, the woman ... Read more ...
5 TED Talks for Developing Emotional Literacies for Racial Justice
Today marks the final day of the 40-day practice I’ve been leading for a local, predominantly-white church on developing emotional literacies. We’ve been focused on building and strengthening emotional awarenesses, knowledges, intelligences, and response-abilities for racial justice. As part of this practice, I’ve been sharing resources, including TED talks that provide language for understanding emotional literacies. In this post, I share five of these talks that are ... Read more ...
Reading Martin Luther King, Jr. as a White Woman in the Work for Racial Justice
Each year, celebrating Martin Luther King, Jr. (MLK) Day in the United States brings new opportunities for mis-appropriating, mis-remembering, and mythologizing Dr. King’s legacy and the broader Civil Rights Movement. White people get the history wrong in many ways. Each year, celebrating MLK Day also brings new opportunities for re-reading Dr. King’s words and re-seeing the work that he—and so many people working for racial justice—have envisioned. MLK offers visions ... Read more ...
A Few of My Favorite Things
December. It’s a hard time for folks walking on wires to please others. It’s a hard time for folks finishing semesters when running on fumes. It’s a hard time for folks grieving family hurts or losses. It’s a hard time for processing what comes up in contemplative moments and social interactions alike. This December is especially hard because it punctuates a year of great injustice, dehumanization, and the increasing visibility of wrongdoings. Now, as so many of us ... Read more ...
What I’ve Learned in the Week Since Charlottesville: Five Lessons for White Folks Who Care about Racism and Racial Justice
This week has been INTENSE. As a writer, educator, and person committed to racial justice and the work of healing internalized white supremacy, I’ve been following and affected by the dysfunction, injury, and trauma on display. I’ve been confronting my own shadow, while watching collective shadows in the United States come into light. And these shadows ask us to reckon with legacies of colonialism and slavery, institutionalized racism, and deep dehumanization. These ... Read more ...
For White Friends Using Social Media and Not Responding to Charlottesville
This post is for white friends who’ve remained silent or continued social media posts as though there’s not a national crisis. Certainly, white supremacy is systemic and personal, historical and contemporary, everyday and ongoing. Yet, this weekend it’s especially visible and sanctioned, immediately resulting in intimidation, terrorism, injury, and death. The events in Charlottesville have wide-reaching impact, and to deny (or fail to engage/recognize) the significance ... Read more ...
Microaggressions Matter
Sunday evening, night of the Oscars. I’m not watching TV, but Skyping with my friend and co-author Rasha Diab, as we work on an upcoming presentation and related academic article. The article’s focus? Proposing a rhetorical framework for countering microaggressions, or everyday and seemingly small, yet cumulative and consequential, actions. Among others, psychologist Derald Wing Sue explains that microaggressions communicate denigrating messages to people of ... Read more ...
![Since posting about turtles earlier this week, I’ve been thinking about the mantra “slow and steady.” Though I’m often hard on myself—noticing all the ways I fall short or don’t act on this mantra—I had a recent reminder that simply doing something regularly, even if less often than I’d like, allows for growth.
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Specifically, this week I “flashed” my first 5.9 climbing route (meaning that I got up the wall on my first try). I’ve been climbing for almost 16 months, and my learning has been slow, slow, slow … More often than not, I feel like I’m struggling. I feel clumsy and shaky. I bump my knees and tweak my shoulders and cry a lot. Yet, by sticking with the work (in this case, climbing), I’m meeting new milestones. A few months ago, I began trying 5.8s, then 5.9s, and now I’m regularly getting up those routes.
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Like a turtle, I’m moving from my starting place, perhaps slower than others and slower than I’d like … but steadily, I’m becoming a “climber,” and surely, I’m learning to stay with what’s hard to develop the stamina and strength to keep going.
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Knowing that stamina is especially needed for white folks to stay in the work for racial justice (and for all sorts of learning-living anti-oppression work), may the image of the turtle and the mantra of “slow and steady” help as guiding points.
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Two steps forward, one step backward, but stepping, still … Step after step after step …
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[This photo of me climbing is from a few months ago, but it shows me working the route. :-)]
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#bloggersofinstagram #socialjusticeeducation #climbing #climbingtraining #climb #climbing_lovers #climbing_photos_of_instagram #belayon #climbon #learning #climbinglessons #slowandsteady #slowingdown #longhaul #slowprogress #slowprogressisstillprogress #stickwithit #steady #saturdayvibes #saturdaymorning #reflection #storytelling #lifelessons #alwayslearning](http://scontent-ort2-2.cdninstagram.com/vp/7044bea515c5aed622b735fa2e0fdcf2/5CEAE4AC/t51.2885-15/sh0.08/e35/c0.134.1080.1080/s640x640/51275780_538507049971301_4950861348305084968_n.jpg?_nc_ht=scontent-ort2-2.cdninstagram.com "Since posting about turtles earlier this week, I’ve been thinking about the mantra “slow and steady.” Though I’m often hard on myself—noticing all the ways I fall short or don’t act on this mantra—I had a recent reminder that simply doing something regularly, even if less often than I’d like, allows for growth.
.
Specifically, this week I “flashed” my first 5.9 climbing route (meaning that I got up the wall on my first try). I’ve been climbing for almost 16 months, and my learning has been slow, slow, slow … More often than not, I feel like I’m struggling. I feel clumsy and shaky. I bump my knees and tweak my shoulders and cry a lot. Yet, by sticking with the work (in this case, climbing), I’m meeting new milestones. A few months ago, I began trying 5.8s, then 5.9s, and now I’m regularly getting up those routes.
.
Like a turtle, I’m moving from my starting place, perhaps slower than others and slower than I’d like … but steadily, I’m becoming a “climber,” and surely, I’m learning to stay with what’s hard to develop the stamina and strength to keep going.
.
Knowing that stamina is especially needed for white folks to stay in the work for racial justice (and for all sorts of learning-living anti-oppression work), may the image of the turtle and the mantra of “slow and steady” help as guiding points.
.
Two steps forward, one step backward, but stepping, still … Step after step after step …
.
[This photo of me climbing is from a few months ago, but it shows me working the route. :-)]
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#bloggersofinstagram #socialjusticeeducation #climbing #climbingtraining #climb #climbing_lovers #climbing_photos_of_instagram #belayon #climbon #learning #climbinglessons #slowandsteady #slowingdown #longhaul #slowprogress #slowprogressisstillprogress #stickwithit #steady #saturdayvibes #saturdaymorning #reflection #storytelling #lifelessons #alwayslearning")
![Still in my first year as a #smallbusiness owner, I can say that this work isn't possible without a strong, supportive network. There are many people to say THANKS to specifically, but let me say today (on #ValentinesDay) that my heart swells whenever I think of the support that's flowed my way this year. Today, may each of us feel a little more love flowing in our directions, a little more love filling up our reservoirs and making possible the work we're each called to do. Truly, you are loved. I send love. <3
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[Image description: This Valentine's Day card is primarily yellow and blue with pink-red flowers lining the bottom. It reads "you are loved" in large script, followed by "Happy Valentine's Day" in all-caps. Below that is the message, repeated in script: "Thanks for your support this year! With love, Beth (Heart-Head-Hands.com)."] .
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#supportwomen #gratitude #lovenothate #love #valentinesday2018 #valentines #grateful #gratitude #loveyou #instalove #lovenote #veganblogger #bloggerlife #bloggersofinstagram #womanownedbusiness #womanowned #womanownedbiz #youareloved #youarelove #thankyou #support #supportivefriends #supportnetwork #sendinglove](http://scontent-ort2-2.cdninstagram.com/vp/3aaa1eed7631b4856bd3035d1d0ee8e0/5CEDC5A1/t51.2885-15/e35/c96.0.479.479/51321814_116709839443439_8702693490264459485_n.jpg?_nc_ht=scontent-ort2-2.cdninstagram.com "Still in my first year as a #smallbusiness owner, I can say that this work isn't possible without a strong, supportive network. There are many people to say THANKS to specifically, but let me say today (on #ValentinesDay) that my heart swells whenever I think of the support that's flowed my way this year. Today, may each of us feel a little more love flowing in our directions, a little more love filling up our reservoirs and making possible the work we're each called to do. Truly, you are loved. I send love. <3
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[Image description: This Valentine's Day card is primarily yellow and blue with pink-red flowers lining the bottom. It reads \"you are loved\" in large script, followed by \"Happy Valentine's Day\" in all-caps. Below that is the message, repeated in script: \"Thanks for your support this year! With love, Beth (Heart-Head-Hands.com).\"] .
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#supportwomen #gratitude #lovenothate #love #valentinesday2018 #valentines #grateful #gratitude #loveyou #instalove #lovenote #veganblogger #bloggerlife #bloggersofinstagram #womanownedbusiness #womanowned #womanownedbiz #youareloved #youarelove #thankyou #support #supportivefriends #supportnetwork #sendinglove")
