Recently, I’ve had several moments of witnessing first-hand the links between settling the body (that is, settling the nervous system) and showing up more mindfully, more open, and more like the “best self” that’s needed when striving for social and racial justice. In contrast, moments when my nervous system is “keyed up” (from exhaustion, from unresolved tension, from disappointment, and more), I find myself having knee-jerk reactions and being short with ... Read more ...
white fragility
Lessons from a Poinsettia: Growing Resilience in 40 Days and Beyond
This poinsettia is amazing me—still blooming in these last days of February and reminding me that resilience (emotional elasticity, stamina, and strength) is something we don't often recognize until it’s already present and in place. When I googled how long poinsettias bloom, I was (and wasn’t) surprised to see that 40 days are a common period. The information not only confirms this poinsettia’s resilience (blooming for 3+ months), but it also feels like the ... Read more ...
Why I Don’t Believe the #CovingtonCatholic Student’s Statement
I woke up today (the day after MLK Day in the U.S.) to a Facebook friend who presents as a white woman asking if I’d seen the #CovingtonCatholic student’s statement because she’s not sure what to believe. Later in the day, a white family member also sent me the statement, presumably to vindicate the white students. These messages come in response to me speaking out over the past few days about the incident, asking for white folks to break patterns of niceness and to ... Read more ...
My New Year’s Resolution = Self-Love for Countering White Fragility
The days leading up to this new year have been bumpy for me, pushing me to recommit to radical self-love. I’ve had some really tough conversations with family around everyday injustice, and these conversations have reminded me why we need a deep well of emotional literacies for confronting complicity. In the midst of one of these tough conversations—in which I was speaking aloud my embodied responses to white supremacy—I shared that my heart was throbbing, and I ... Read more ...
Hurting and Hollering in the Wake of This Week’s Violence
Bombs sent, guns shot. And I cry. Histories hidden, truths buried. And I ache. Hateful laws, escalating harms. And I mourn. White terrorism, everyday violence. And I rage. Black folks targeted. Jewish folks targeted. Native folks targeted. Latinx folks targeted. Migrant folks targeted. Trans folks targeted. Femme folks targeted. Marginalized folks targeted. Targeted, passive voice. Failing to name the assailants. Failing to name white supremacist, ... Read more ...
Crocheting Granny Squares, Connecting to Grandmothers, and Crafting a More Just Future
Recently, I felt inspired to pick up crocheting again, after many seasons without touching a needle, hook, or yarn. Feeling the call for creative self-care, I ordered vegan yarn in the colors of the 7 chakras and laid them out, planning a small afghan of granny squares. Thread yarn onto hook. Chain five, and connect stitches, making a circle. Days after purchasing the yarn and only a few stitches into my first granny square, my mom shared some news. Betty, the woman ... Read more ...
5 TED Talks for Developing Emotional Literacies for Racial Justice
Today marks the final day of the 40-day practice I’ve been leading for a local, predominantly-white church on developing emotional literacies. We’ve been focused on building and strengthening emotional awarenesses, knowledges, intelligences, and response-abilities for racial justice. As part of this practice, I’ve been sharing resources, including TED talks that provide language for understanding emotional literacies. In this post, I share five of these talks that are ... Read more ...
Reading Martin Luther King, Jr. as a White Woman in the Work for Racial Justice
Each year, celebrating Martin Luther King, Jr. (MLK) Day in the United States brings new opportunities for mis-appropriating, mis-remembering, and mythologizing Dr. King’s legacy and the broader Civil Rights Movement. White people get the history wrong in many ways. Each year, celebrating MLK Day also brings new opportunities for re-reading Dr. King’s words and re-seeing the work that he—and so many people working for racial justice—have envisioned. MLK offers visions ... Read more ...
A Few of My Favorite Things
December. It’s a hard time for folks walking on wires to please others. It’s a hard time for folks finishing semesters when running on fumes. It’s a hard time for folks grieving family hurts or losses. It’s a hard time for processing what comes up in contemplative moments and social interactions alike. This December is especially hard because it punctuates a year of great injustice, dehumanization, and the increasing visibility of wrongdoings. Now, as so many of us ... Read more ...
What I’ve Learned in the Week Since Charlottesville: Five Lessons for White Folks Who Care about Racism and Racial Justice
This week has been INTENSE. As a writer, educator, and person committed to racial justice and the work of healing internalized white supremacy, I’ve been following and affected by the dysfunction, injury, and trauma on display. I’ve been confronting my own shadow, while watching collective shadows in the United States come into light. And these shadows ask us to reckon with legacies of colonialism and slavery, institutionalized racism, and deep dehumanization. These ... Read more ...
