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Announcing the Decision to Leave Higher Ed: 3 Responses that Surprised Me

Filed Under: Higher Education By Beth Godbee January 16, 2019 Leave a Comment

This screenshot shows the start of the IHE article, “What I Learned as I Was Leaving,” along with the stock photo of a woman opening a key-shaped door.Today the fourth part of my series “Outside Higher Ed” appeared in Inside Higher Ed.

This piece shares three common responses to my news of leaving academia:

  1. “Good for you. I wish I could leave.”
  2. “You’re so brave.”
  3. “That’s a really big decision. Will you be ok?”

I also share my emotional reactions and processing around these responses, which truly surprised me.

More than anything else, I learned through announcing my decision that I’m not alone in struggling with higher ed. I explain in the article:

“In story after story, I’ve learned that I’m not alone in experiencing frustrations with overwork and burnout. I’m not alone in struggling to address rape culture, accumulating microaggressions, the trauma of graduate education, and other injustices in academe. I’m not alone in experiencing various pushes away from higher ed and pulls toward something else, especially public writing and community education. Only when announcing my decision to leave did I hear others’ stories and realize that, truly, I am not alone.

It was only after announcing my news that other academics opened up to me about exploring options outside higher education but keeping this exploration quiet for fear of how colleagues might react. I hope that sharing these three common responses might help other academics bolster their own courage to talk about career decisions and to make announcements. For if we are to follow our commitments, we need courage — regardless of whether we stay or go.”

If you mentor others, if you’re interested in better supporting colleagues, or if you’re engaged in career exploration yourself, I hope you’ll check out this piece.

It appears at a time when I’m gearing up to launch my first e-courses. One is a 40-day practice on strengthening emotional literacies to counter white fragility, starting March 6th to align with Lent. The other focuses on the subject of this essay and others in the “Outside Higher Ed” series.

Titled “Career Discernment for Academics: Aligning Career with Commitments,” the e-course will offer self-paced study through a range of contemplative practices and writing exercises as well as one-with-one coaching.

This e-course announcement shows a yellow sunflower and blue sky. It includes a textbox with the following information:
I’ll be publishing the e-course page with more information soon!

Though the course begins on February 19th, it can be taken anytime. It will make use of my Inside Higher Ed articles, offer learning modules with recorded presentations, and suggest a range of career discernment practices. There will be options to meet in one or two 50-minute coaching sessions to talk through your questions, experiences, and goals, too.

For now, if you’d like to know more, feel free to email me with your interest or with questions about the course. I sincerely hope that this e-course, like this new piece in IHE, invigorates meaningful, commitment-driven career conversations.

—
This post is written by Beth Godbee for Heart-Head-Hands.com. For more posts like this one, you might try “Deciding to Leave Higher Ed: Strategies for Career Discernment” and “Planning a Career Change in 3 Stages.”

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This grid shows four colorful cacti (two above and two below) the event information (black font against white background): “Monthly Gathering Space: Recharge and Recommit. For details, see Heart-Head-Hands.com.”This e-course announcement shows a yellow sunflower and blue sky. It includes a textbox with the following information: “E-COURSE AVAILABLE NOW! Career Discernment for Academics: Aligning Career with Commitments. Self-paced study, exercises, coaching, and more ...”

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I’m really excited about @soulsupportlc and hope I’m really excited about @soulsupportlc and hope you’ll check out David (@dgs425)’s coaching support. 💗 See you at the launch?

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Congratulations, David! 💜😭✨🌻🎉💃🏿💕 Today my beloved announced that he has decided to leave his position as a tenure-track faculty member in order to create more space to serve his purpose as a healer. Doing so, he has formally launched his life coaching practice, @soulsupportlc. I say formally because David has been a life coach to me and many of our kindred for a very long time. I am so glad he has chosen to share his gifts and serve his purpose more widely. Please follow his work at @soulsupportlc AND if your time permits, please register and attend the Soul Support Life Coaching virtual launch on June 30. Link in my bio!
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#learningfromnature #cloudwatching #lookingup #trees #sky
I'm starting some time off for hiking and visiting I'm starting some time off for hiking and visiting family this week. And here's a photo of me at a North Carolina welcome center, high in the Appalachian Mountains, standing before a wall of blooming rhododendrons. I'm tired from all-day driving, but so happy to be deep in the mountains and surrounded by blues, greens, and even pinks! <3

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Today’s newsletter points in multiple directions Today’s newsletter points in multiple directions, much like this turkey tail mushroom. (I love the striations of copper, cream, and olive green on these curly tails.)
 
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・・・
The first person to show me the power of bearing witness was Helen, my first year Women and Gender Studies professor. Helen was a fierce feminist whose lectures felt more like prose, poetic and passionate. She made me want to take a hammer to patriarchy, and I loved it. 

With Helen, I felt safe enough to say the things I could barely articulate to myself. To name my wounds, to language hard truths, to let someone else in on my hurt. And with Helen, I felt held in those lived and living realities. There were no therapeutic interventions, no life adages, no solutions. There was simply a human being listening, honouring and affirming my experiences of misogyny, racism and sexual violence.

Years later, I forgot this wisdom. I went through therapeutic training(s) that, over time, left me feeling like that wasn't enough. That listening, and presence, and holding space for hurt wasn't enough. And in many aspects of life, I started to feel like I always needed a brilliant intervention that would offer an "aha moment." 

This week, I was reminded in many ways of the power of being present, of listening, of bearing witness. That you don't always need to have the answers, or offer your critical feminist thinking on a topic. You don't always need to have a solution, or advice. And you don't always need to intellectualize what someone's going through. Sometimes, you can just climb into the emotional fort they've built, grab a pillow, and be there. 

Yup, you can just be there, friend. And that's enough. 

(Consensually*)

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About Beth Godbee

I'm an educator and former college professor who believes our fully embodied selves matter in the world. We can’t just think our way out of the incredible injustices, dehumanization, violence, and wrongdoing that characterize everyday life. We must feel and act, too. [Pronouns: she/her.] Read more ...

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